Feeling Lucky

Scrolling through my Instagram newsfeed each night before bed I am greeted with lots of images based on my previous hashtags..

Image upon image of children in intensive care from either Cancer or other diseases such as heart disease, cystic fibrosis, lung disease etc. and those that were just born too early and not strong enough. Images of children on ventilators that make me think back to those times that was us. Images of children that look like they are sleeping peacefully, with tag lines reading "we miss you" or "pray for this child who lost their fight". Images of parents holding their beautiful children for the very last time..

Whilst it reminds me of all the horrific parts we've faced in our journey so far, it also makes me think how lucky we I am..

I am SO lucky.. my child is a miracle and he came back from the brink when I know that he technically shouldn't have survived. We are lucky to have him in our lives each and every day even despite the illness and it's hurdles. Even those horrible memories, however painful, are a reminder that we survived it all together.

I am SO lucky to have two more boys that are so very special in their own ways. I truly believe they were all given to me for a reason.. Bryce is my strength, my anchor in the storm. Dylan is my hope, my guiding light in the darkness. And little Logan is my happiness, my sunshine on a rainy day.

I am SO lucky to have a supportive husband who doesn't hold against me the moments I faltered or made wrong choices. A lot of marriages wouldn't have survived what we have, sadly I've seen first hand numerous families ripped apart in Paediatric Intensive Care. 

I am SO lucky to have family close by that are willing to help out whenever they can. I don't know what I would have done without them taking care of Bryce and coming to support us during the hardest parts especially.

I am SO lucky to have such an amazing care team from the doctors to the nurses and the support workers and charities. We are blessed to have a network of help and advice and that our team are always willing  to seek the best advice out there.

I am SO lucky to have found a support group for this diagnosis that have been invaluable in their knowledge of the latest treatments, side effects and dealing with every day life throughout the chaos.

I am SO lucky to have a roof over my head, heating and hot water, a car to get to appointments and in case of emergencies, and food in the fridge and freezer to keep us strong.

However hard life gets, however tough each day may seem, I personally find that it can help to take a step back and think of all the things in your life you have to be grateful for. Your worst day might be somebody else's best day.. 

"If you are still breathing then maybe today hasn't been so bad.."